Two precious little ones who we have had the honor and privilege of caring for over the last 3+ years have gone.
I can't share their story on here, but I can share a little of my heart and what the Lord has been teaching me through it all. I wish there were more stories shared to help prepare foster families for these inevitable times and so that is why I open my hurting heart right now. So often our families go into orphan/foster care with starry eyes, ready to change the world one child and family at a time! While these are great intentions, we also have to be prepared for what is REALLY to come...
But wait! We WERE told we would face pain and hardships! Right in the Bible Jesus Himself tells us we will!
John 16:33 "...in the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world!"
Would we/do we do it all again? Yes. And we continue on ONLY because we have also seen the beauty in it all. God's stories. Even through a completely devistated, broken and disgusting system, we still see God working. I know our family wouldn't be where we are today if it weren't for the hardships we have been through.
James 1:2-4 "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, when you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
While we still lack much, through the lessons we have learned, we have all grown closer to our Lord and Savior which makes EVERYTHING worth it.
Do they remember that God loves them and will never leave them even when everyone around them fails to do so?
I can only pray that they do. And no one on earth can stop me from praying for them even when I can do nothing for them physically right now.
Please mothers! Don't complain about all the hard work and messes! Be THANKFUL for them! Be thankful you have the work and mess-makers! They are blessings! Praise God for each slimy finger print, the crayon "artwork" on the wall and that 3rd accident of the day due to toilet training. They are blessings. They really are when seen in a different perspective.
But not because I wish I had loved them less to save my own heart from the aching.
I regret not holding them more... until my arms fell off,
until I had NO breath left in my body.
Being a follower of Christ is the hardest yet most beautiful life imaginable. I pray that someday I will learn to love with no regrets!